#FreestyleFriday: 1.12.18

To me? Finding peace is like climbing Mt. Everest

That’s why I don’t like crazy chicks, I don’t negotiate with terrorists

Balling so hard, I might mess around and tear my wrist

I don’t want them to step in my shoes, they might scuff up my favorite kicks

King Diddy, I never enjoyed all the anticipation

People always wanna rush thing but I believe in pacing

Because when I was all gung-ho? I needed patience

And I trust few people because they’re often know for giving statements

Keep that energy, don’t be fatigued when you see the kid

Like a janitor cleaning up bathrooms, I’m with the shits

And people thinking they’re gonna touch me and split my wig

I laugh like, I didn’t know you were a beautician sis?

A man makes the clothes, clothes never make the man

I used to carry out auditions like they were trying to make the band

I gave up making excuses, and I’m not interested in making amends

Focus my energy on making progress, I think make enough friends

I can’t entertain certain things for the sake of my sanity

Because I’m trying to get my life back to where I planned it’d be

Armed with dedication and a catalogue of plans A to Z

Stopping myself from catching feelings because there’s no vacancy.

They say that I’m jaded, I agree with him, no need to lie.

And if your ass owes me 6 dollars, don’t give me 5.

I been looking at life a little different since I almost died

The devil can’t take my joy away from, even though he always tries.

Do the right thing? Well we need something to incentivize

And if you scared to shoot your shot? I say to you, let it fly.

Hearing people complain puts me to sleep faster than a lullaby

Blowing so much hot air, a balloon could use it in the friendly skies

I used to be friendly, now I’m more cautious

The people who used to hate, now they’re getting nauseous

I used to be a diamond in the rough, now I’m more polished

Now success is in my genes like I added something to the garments.

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Family Feud 2017

I been on a writing hiatus tying to get this podcast going

They say when it rains, it pours. But what happens when it’s snowing?

They are trying to prevent me from taking the shot, like they’re Bruce Bowen

But niggas can’t stop the light and my nigga, I’m glowing.

I’m a king. This the last time I’m going to say that though

I find no use in advertising something that people already know

No one wins when the family feuds and niggas been feuding all year

But if we’re dealing with love and war, then some would say its all fair

If we are preparing for a battle, I’mma get my riot gear.

My mom is a prayer warrior, I’m gonna get my squad in here.

Too many people died this year, too many people lied this year

And we still haven’t got Donald trump the fuck out of here

Going into 2018 with my mind all clear.

I walk to the beat of my own drum & I don’t care if you like the snare

People think I’m gambling with my life? I told them to pick a pair

Niggas acting foul always the ones that say life ain’t fair.

Keep it cool as cucumbers, if you slept on me, enjoy the slumber

I’m not just a 1 hit wonder, I can’t even wait til the summer

If they block the door, dig a tunnel. If they question you, they don’t love you

People love crushing dreams under the guise of keeping you humble

Let me dream what I want, let me plan how I please.

I never throw shade at anyone, you never know who you might need

Trying to get closer to my goals, closer to my dreams

Closer to my bae, wherever may she be.

I ain’t never been in the army, but I want to be all I can be

Trying to lift every voice & sing like the NAACP

I used to want people to love me, now I prefer respect

And anything I respect? Has to come to me direct

Direct disses, direct messages and direct deposits

Direct flights and direct increases to my flight mileage.

Directions to my goals and dreams so I can keep driving

And direct points for all the pressure I keep applying.

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Part Time Lovers

Part time lovers. Our time together is our time together

And when we’re apart, what we do? It’s whatever

Keep it on a need to know, I don’t need to tell you how it needs to go

Just be prepared when their heart turns 3 below

Yeah we’re talking super cold, folks out here getting super bold

Trying to figure out where you stand is getting super old

We treat partners like options on some sort of poll

Asked her for her list of dealbreakers? She opened a scroll

We always tell people, play your position, play your role

And if you want a promotion, better let someone know

Treating dating like a revolving door, they come and go.

And if people wanted me gone, this year? They cut it close

If love is a drug, you would mess around and overdose

I’m cut from a different cloth, I got it all covered like an overcoat

King Diddy, if you believed I was dating every person you seen with me

You’d thought I’m taking as many swings at love as Ken Griffey

I ask them to bear with me like I was a panda or a grizzly

And I show them the bare truth like Paul Pierce running naked through the city

I dabble in some things, call it girlfriend by committee

I might even need an old Miss like college football in Mississippi

Ya dig me? No one stayed with me when I was broke

So I can’t trust no one that if they seem me drowning, they’ll help me float

I don’t brag or boast, keep my business more private than most

And I scrape the dead ends off like I overcooked the toast

Never been in love, been in infatuation at most

Almost thought I had something but I stress the word almost

Every time you think you have something then someone goes ghost

Everyone thinks they are investigators from a simple IG post

It’s hard work, it’s God work. So I must let his will be done

Momma’s favorite son, walking around like I’m the chosen one

Being single doesn’t faze me, it’s like being robbed with a water gun

Part time lover? Full time headache? Nah, I don’t need that one

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What Are You Looking For?

I used to be a hopeless romantic, before I got jaded

When Bey and Jay wrote Drunk In Love, I was hoping that I could also be faded

Trying to be the greatest person that you deserve.

Like a dictionary bandit, I got a way with words

If I fuck with you? Then to me? You’re as fly as a bird

And anyone who says different is just plain absurd

I’m a different type.

You see I got more flavor than a handful of Mike and Ike’s

If I get a second chance at love I hope it’s twice as nice

Because I’mma be on point like the sharpest knife

If I’m focused on you then I’m focused on you

If I don’t feel like there’s hope for you then there’s no hope for you

I’m a simple man, with somewhat simple needs

HaHa Davis during the honeymoon phase “This Finna Be a Breeze”

Ain’t a street nigga but I’m a nigga from the streets

Was taught not to show love, so in relationships I play for keeps

I can play my role, let you be Jay, I’m Memphis Bleek

But you don’t know what I have in my bag, trick or treat.

You want someone that can listen to your problems, I can be that guy

Want someone to let you vent & not try and solve ‘em, I can give it a try

I’mma work with you, try to meet you where you are

But you better bring your sunglasses because you’re meeting with a star

People keep taking shots at me, but don’t want to meet me at the bar

But if you got drive like I got drive? Then meet me at the car

I don’t have all day to wait for you. Unless you believe in perfect timing

I see all these dark clouds, you trying to be my silver lining?

Whatever it means to be loved, we can redefine it

And if you are a diamond in the rough then I’m gonna go mining

What are you looking for beloved? What do you hope to find?

What are your long-term plans? They the same as mine?

Are you willing to go for it or is it a nevermind

Because you don’t have to hit every shot you take, you just need one good time.

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No Hate on Sundays

My beloved reminded me to use this writing this as an outlet

I just need someone down for me like Cardi is with Offset

But that doesn’t have me upset, honestly it was a gut check

Trying to live the high life but I still hang around some roughnecks

What’s a king without a crown? Is he still a king?

Is it all about the jewelry or is it more about what he brings?

I haven’t been sleeping much is that why I resort to selling dreams?

Am I hurting much worse than I certainly make it seem?

Shit, I don’t know the answers. That’s why I ask these questions

Shit, people say they care for me, why they so passive aggressive?

Why are they so wishy washy? Why are they so temperamental?

Why do they seem to enjoy all the drama they get into?

Shit, I don’t know the answers, that’s why I ask these questions

She says she can teach me, I’m like “well class is in session”

Let me get my pen and paper, make sure I have my highlighter

Because people can’t see the truth, it’s like they’re totally nearsighted

And me, I’m nearsighted too, at least I try to fix the problem

Y’all spend so much time on everyone else, y’all miss the problem.

I’m laid back but still with the shits, success doesn’t need witnesses

Sometimes it’s best to keep it under wrap like a Christmas gift

I want to own and mind my own business. You don’t need to get it

People been kicking game for free and somehow you still miss it

I’m just saying, I’m not even asking for real, just realistic

And if I offer a life boat to you, why can’t y’all go get it?

But hey, there are things in life that ain’t for me to understand

I’ve seen first hand how power can corrupt a man

These gentlemen out here tripping, they think they can touch whoever

Every pirate ain’t meant to get to these women/s buried treasure.

I’m just a humble servant, who strayed too far away, I’m trying to get back

Who can give you something sweet every 4 bars, I’m a kit kat

Trying to stay away from the riff raff, people out here strapped like a gift bag

You want to win, I need to win and that’s why this is a mismatch.

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No Fairy Tales

The seasonal depression hit, cold weather makes cold spirits

And what good is expressing yourself when these folks don’t want to hear it?

Praying for a breakthrough, but fuck it, I got to make it happen

No fairy tales, just hard work because real shit doesn’t come from Magic

Can’t be throwing lobs to everyone because I ain’t Bron or Magic.

These niggas think they earned their stripes, but they don’t deserve the badges

But they say I’m too dramatic. But when I share the shit you’re not welcoming

That’s why I’m married to the game and no one will receive a wedding ring

I can’t be forced to settle. I can’t be forced to accept less

You say what I want isn’t realistic and I tell you just to be blessed

God’s probably ashamed I feel stressed, like son look at what I’ve done for you

And I’m like “God I hear you, but I need more to feel comfortable”

I don’t like being vulnerable. So, intimacy is a stretch for me

I sat down, I put in the work and these niggas still ask requests of me

I told these fools that I’m tired of giving you the best of me

Then sitting down and figuring out how to make do with what’s left of me

I feel like someone’s testing me. Trying to see if I change the recipe

If there’s a secret ingredient, I say nope just me

There’s people in my life that probably hate when I get this way

But I spent my life grinding now I’m just trying to blow up, no Tim McVay

I want my rings and medals like the Olympic logo on full display

So no fool can say that in the book on the history of life, I don’t get a page.

I want to be so impactful that when I die, the whole world stops

Not on some superficial shit, I just want my work to live on, when I’m not

Been getting body blows left and right and Bobbie dying feels like a spine shot

Feels like the whole neighborhood watching but this ain’t a crime watch

I want movie plots over burial plots. I want us to go the better route

I want us to plan better. More life insurance and less gofundme accounts

And that’s not a shot at no one, because we do what we can when times get hard.

I just don’t want to be one missed car note from losing my house and my job

I don’t want to live paycheck to paycheck, I want something bigger.

Yeah the fairy tales are cool and all but me and mine need something realer.

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Make Me Believe Again

Make me believe in something I lost faith in

When they didn’t have a spot for me, I made a way in

And I been praying for a change, can I get an amen?

And I been put through the fire like a hazing

I’m just a young black man with the world on my shoulders

And I smell like success, you can smell the aroma

Are you good to the last drop like a cup full of Folgers?

And these people spreading lies, don’t listen to a word that they told you

We could make magic happen, pull happiness like a trick up my sleeve

When I don’t feel wanted, I fall back like when a hairline recedes

Sometimes I feel like it’s the whole world versus me

I just need someone to have my back, even when I can’t see

I ain’t on no simp shit, or pimp shit, this is somewhere in the middle

If she says I’m a dog, then I’mma treat her like some kibbles

She wanted me to taste the rainbow, treat her like some skittles

But I’m still a busy man, I don’t have the time for riddles

So say what you mean and mean what you say

If you want me to fall back, say it. Promise I’ll be ok

If you think I’m playing games, tell me, there could be a change.

And I’ll give you the courtesy to treat your ass just the same.

I believe in 50/50, not 100/0 or 60/40

If there’s beauty in the struggle, then my journey has been gorgeous.

She wanted me to magic trick on her? So I disappeared

I might just be cutting people off for the rest of the year

If the game is rigged, the only way to win is to not play.

If you aren’t bringing peace into my home, then you cannot stay.

I’m a little jaded, but I’m working on myself though

Drama always sticking to me, like a pair of velcro’s

Been through hell and back, guess what? I’m still dope

I just need your ray of sunshine to give me a little hope

So make me believe in something I lost all belief in

Someone’s gonna get the best of me, put yourself in the lead then

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In My Zone

I’m in my zone like a 2-3 defense.

When you’re cooking up greatness, no one has to see it

My mind is on my money, keep my money off your mind

And to the people acting funny, don’t worry I’m doing just fine.

I been doubted, I been kicked, I been lied on too

And even thought you lied on me, I never lied on you.

I keep it 100, like a Wilt Chamberlin high score

You think I’m ugly? Well people out there think I’m to die for

Respect it, I was out here wearing my burdens like it was a necklace

And I was struggling with the extra weight like I’m precious

Anti-social extravert, when the prayers go up I know blessings work

And people count on me like the checks that come in on the 1st

I’m on it, I have no other choice, they’re gonna hear my voice

Like when the Celtics traded for Kyrie, they get the point

You get the message? No longer obsessed with perfection

I been playing with my God given talents too long, might miss my blessings

I can’t survive the way y’all survive, I gotta thrive though

It was written to excuse my difference, like it was a doctor’s note

I got everything you need, like a convenience store

You did me dirty? I still shine, I got the mop n’ glow

Sometimes the food for thought, isn’t easy to digest

And if I leave the world tomorrow, I’ll make sure to die blessed

If your conversations equal complications then you don’t deserve my concentration

You supposed to be easy breezy beautiful, but all you bring is frustration

I been slacking with the writing since I started doing the podcast

It’s like I’m digging, trying to avoid my triggers, like mine craft

If I could twist time the way I twist my words, I could make time stand

And still always be on your side, like a night stand

I am, Mr. Unbreakable, Mr. Unshakable

Whose mind was so sick, they had to rush me past the waiting room

You ain’t in tune, I’m important, the process is gorgeous

And if you can’t picture it yet, you don’t deserve the portrait.

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#FreestyleFriday: 9.29.17

I’m trying to get it together, to survive in any era

Looking in the mirror, needing to prove that I’m better

Than whoever they place in front of me, make competition regret it

I’m cool as a bag of lettuce, doing it with no effort.

Doing it with no pressure versus doing it with all the pressure

Feel like you’re running for your life & you pray that the dogs don’t catch you

Pushing yourself even faster, trying to test your limits

Because can’t no one tell you how to do it unless they already did it

The Lord said all is forgiven, if you ask for repentance

I know some homies in prison wishing they had a lighter sentence

It can be hard to lighten the mood, when all you hear is doom and gloom

When you walk in and you’re both the smartest and poorest person in the room.

Rich man making poor decisions, young man making life decisions

You make a wrong move, they make the cut like a bad audition

Made a dollar out of 15 cents, barely had a pot to piss in

But somehow every year, I celebrated a birthday and Christmas

Mom didn’t want me to read Harry Potter but she was still a wizard

Fast forward and when it comes to my foundation, she is still a fixture

Focus on me, otherwise you might mess up the picture

High resolution, high stakes, you get it my nigga

I’m a lover, not a fighter but I’ll fight for what I love

I’m a salesman baby, I can sell salt to a slug

I can sell water to a well, I can sell ice to an eskimo

I can make your homie stay when she said she’s ready to go

The talentless are trying to inherit the earth, I can’t have that.

I’m trying to see my stock rise without the NASDAQ

And I know everyone hates a “pick me” headass

But even without extra credit I’m still the head of the class

First and never last, mind racing faster than The Flash

Living life in the fast lane, praying I never crash

They say a picture’s worth a thousand words, and if we do the math

Take a screenshot of this and I’ll autograph the photograph.

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#FreestyleFriday: 9.15.17

I always said I had trust issues before trust issues became mainstream

Been with too many people’s main thing to even trust my main thing

I guess these trust issues just been eating at me like gangrene

Never been the type to trade scenes, still giving medicine to the fiends

In the form of scriptures, in the form of gems, you think I’m out on the corner?

Because when you choose the corner, the detectives end up choosing the coroner

Tried to lead a straight and narrow path, still got this monkey on the back

Still preparing for attack, still wishing I had my granny back

I used to be a hopeless romantic so it’s funny that I’m jaded now

She’s all natural but I gave her a perm to get that attitude straightened out

She used to be all shy but she’s telling me the truth since she’s faded now

She loved my cool demeanor but she hate it now, ever since I invaded south

The things you’re saying, at this point seem like pure contradiction

It’s so hard to tell from fact or fiction, people always change up descriptions

I swear you’re harder to read than Apple’s terms and conditions

I don’t know why you started tripping, life hit you hard like Sonny Liston?

I hope I don’t sound superstitious, but you’re not something I can believe in

I spent 5 months in the 4 seasons, almost fell in love over 3 weekends

How can you be both saint and sinner? Can you be both holy and a heathen?

Has the student become the master? Does the pupil know all the teachings?

Is it like Brady when he can read a defense? Synchronized divers off the deep end?

Is the form so good that they just assume that he’s cheating?

Ya’ll want notoriety? Y’all can keep it. My brother keep the iron low like he’s anemic

Had good people fall through the cracks like cleavage, others who felt mistreated

I had people say some real messed up stuff to me and then say they didn’t mean it

I had friends fall out with other friends & both sides wanted me in between it

I told them both I can’t do it, then I backed out like Cam Newton

When he was in the Super Bowl and had his chance then he blew it

See form that I learned a lesson, that there’s no second guessing

And once you think you have all the answers then they change the questions

I’m trying to be a blessing, she’s just trying to have me stressing

So I pointed her to the exit door and I gave her the right directions

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